Syd Barrets acid trip

lost in pink

it's been raining for hours.

drip drop drip drop drip drop drip drop

i contract, my mind runs on its own, time is not enough.

u still are not well.

i hear the rain fall.

drop after drop.

i have left my home for 2 years...

i didn't have time to say goodbye properly.

i felt pushed out, rushed, constrained.

i have let go.

a new cycle begins, i am in the in-between.

happy

full of light & love.

hope

i am lost in pink.

packing

finally it is time to move again.

I love putting all into boxes...

throwing some things out and packing the rest.

cleansing times, letting go...

anxious to create a new space.

home.

Life Inc.

fire under water

yet alive.

rainy days, happy days.

mimetizando

soleil

tu es en moi.

kin 94: White Electric Wizard

I Activate in order to Enchant

Bonding Receptivity

I seal the Output of Timelessness

With the Electric tone of Service

I am guided by the power of Endlessness

carnivoritatransplantatunelnaturaeternity

time to enter the tunel.

basic healing

speak truth

heart

love

change

evolution

confrontation

focus

life

decision

nostalgique reflexions...

i remember when, why & how

pupils meeting, clouds smoothly moving

mirrors reflecting so clearly it seems like water... or the other way around.

the puzzle is incomplete but all the pieces are here.

the sound of crickets, of nothingness, of natura, of past/present/future days.

u dive into the greenness.

i dive into myself.

be true, falsely honest, everything is fake in a way.

words & formulas are not reality, feelings, emotions, thoughts, movement in eternity.

i remember to look into the mirror and follow the rabbit.

under the lemon tree

natura healing mandala

healing moments.

breathing fresh air in the mountains.

harmonynatura

hearing bells in the quiet of the night...

ehecatl

le vent souffle,

et tout s'envole...

temps de lacher.

souffle qui souffle...

I know what I have to do

I am conscious, I breathe.

I am aware, I shine.

I Play, I Love.

Trust is sometimes absent.

I believe a sacred link has been broken.

I know not all the truth has been spoken.

Diwali, time to cleanse.

House, body, mind, & spirit.

always an open heart.

3 days.

healing, cleansing, forgiving.

mountains, fairy, home, peace, quiet, stars, nature, harmony, light, dance, ceremonies, rituals, growing, cultivating, focusing, cleansing, healing, strength, love, sleep, heal, green, inner quiet,

quiet inner

time to heal, time to grow stronger, time to believe.

Talks and Writings of G. I. Gurdjieff

THERE DO EXIST ENQUIRING MINDS, which long for the truth of the heart, seek it, strive to solve the problems set by life, try to penetrate to the essence of things and phenomena and to penetrate into themselves. If a man reasons and thinks soundly, no matter which path he follows in solving these problems, he must inevitably arrive back at himself, and begin with the solution of the problem of what he is himself and what his place is in the world around him. For without this knowledge, he will have no focal point in his search. Socrates’ words, “Know thyself” remain for all those who seek true knowledge and being.

VIEWS FROM THE REAL WORLD, p. 43 [pb]

LIBERATION LEADS TO LIBERATION. These are the first words of truth—not truth in quotation marks but truth in the real meaning of the word; truth which is not merely theoretical, not simply a word, but truth that can be realized in practice. The meaning behind these words may be explained as follows:

By liberation is meant the liberation which is the aim of all schools, all religions, at all times.

This liberation can indeed be very great. All men desire it and strive after it. But it cannot be attained without the first liberation, a lesser liberation. The great liberation is liberation from influences outside us. The lesser liberation is liberation from influences within us.

VIEWS FROM THE REAL WORLD, p. 266

WILL IS A SIGN OF A BEING OF A VERY HIGH ORDER OF EXISTENCE as compared with the being of an ordinary man. Only men who are in possession of such a being can do. All other men are merely automata, put into action by external forces like machines or clockwork toys, acting as much and as long as the wound-up spring within them acts, and not capable of adding anything to its force.

VIEWS FROM THE REAL WORLD, p. 71

Faith of consciousness is freedom

Faith of feeling is weakness

Faith of body is stupidity.

Love of consciousness evokes the same in response

Love of feeling evokes the opposite

Love of body depends only on type and polarity.

Hope of consciousness is strength

Hope of feelings is slavery

Hope of body is disease.

BEELZEBUB’S TALES, p. 361

Culture is your operating system

some more by anaïs nin

"and the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom."

"I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does bot believe me naïve or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman."

"Life is a process of becoming, a combination of states we have to go through. Where people fail is that they wish to elect a state and remain in it. This is a kind of death."

quotes from Tropic of Cancer

"I have no money, no resources, no hopes. I am the happiest man alive. A year ago, six months ago, I thought that I was an artist. I no longer think about it, I am. Everything that was literature has fallen from me. There are no more books to be written, thank God. This then? This is not a book. This is libel, slander, and defamation of character. This is not a book, in the ordinary sense of the word. No, this is a prolonged insult, a gob of spit in the face of Art, a kick in the pants of God, Man, Destiny, Time, Love, Beauty… what you will. I am going to sing for you, a little off-key perhaps, but I will sing. I will sing while you croak, I will dance over your dirty corpse."

"A glance at that dark, unstitched wound and a deep fissure in my brain opens up: all the images and memories that had been laboriously or absent-mindedly assorted, labelled, documented, files, sealed and stamped break forth pellmell like ants pouring out of a crack in the sidewalk; the world ceases to revolve, time stops, the very nexus of my dreams is broken and dissolved and my guts spill out in a grand schizophrenic rush, an evacuation that leaves me face to face with the Absolute."

"Life moves on, whether we act as cowards or heroes. Life has no other discipline to impose, if we would but realize it, than to accept life unquestioningly. Everything we shut our eyes to, everything we run away from, everything we deny, denigrate or despise, serves to defeat us in the end. What seems nasty, painful, evil, can become a source of beauty, joy, and strength, if faced with an open mind. Every moment is a golden one for him who has the vision to recognize it as such."

Henry Miller, Tropic of Cancer (1934)

faire l'amour.

the maya of eternal time

Nicotine

Hymn to the Dope

Goddess of the murmuring courts,

Nicotine, my Nicotine,

Houri of the mystic sports,

trailing-robed in gabardine,

Gliding where the breath hath glided,

Hidden sylph of filmy veils,

Truth behind the dream is veiléd

E'en as thou art, smiling ever, ever gliding,

Wraith of wraiths, dim lights dividing

Purple, grey, and shadow green

Goddess, Dream-grace, Nicotine.

Goddess of the shadow's lights,

Nicotine, my Nicotine,

Some would set old Earth to rights,

Thou I none such ween.

Veils of shade our dream dividing,

Houris dancing, intergliding,

Wraith of wraiths and dream of faces,

Silent guardian of the old unhallowed places,

Utter symbol of all old sweet druidings,

Mem'ry of witched wold and green,

Nicotine, my Nicotine:

Neath the shadows of thy weaving

Dreams that need no undeceiving,

Loves that longer hold me not,

Dreams I dream not any more,

Fragrance of old sweet forgotten places,

Smiles of dream-lit, flit-by faces

All as perfume Arab-sweet

Deck the high road to thy feet

As were Godiva's coming fated

And all the April's blush belated

Were lain before her, carpeting

The stones of Coventry with spring,

So thou my mist-enwreathéd queen,

Nicotine, white Nicotine,

Riding engloried in they hair

Mak'st by-road of our dreams

Thy thorough-fare.

Ezra Pound

dolls

its mama's birthday.

she turns 31.

wish i was in norbury to wake her up and take her down to wandsworth bridge road.

stop @ joe's brasserie for a virgin mary and some eggs florentine

and then head up to central london for a leffe and some chinese after long hours of shopping.

tele-transportation i am ready for u!

the I in the triangle

smooth sounds jamming

I found my home

today 07-10-09.

a beautiful place perfect for me.

in the middle of the mountains, of green.

a horse is there.

my home...

I must look no more

tomorrow

driving alone again...

house hunting in the mountains.

time to find my own space.

Continue to make the path.

la lutte contre les démons...

éternelle

difficile

délicieuse.

confuse

j'essaye tous les jours de croire, d'oublier, de ne pas porter de baggages...

I believe in life, in light in love.

I listen to my heart.

just another sunday

where reality is abrupt.

flying, fleeing, forgetting, forging, frenetic, fried, fantastic.

the sun shines...

& @night...

you unleash.

i am shocked, stoned.

you say... you vomit it all unconsciously conscious...

u r right too, i guess, i know actually...

i wish u could get into my mind after so long.

i wish u could see it all...

the light, the fight, how tight it all actually is.

i see where you are coming from, i understand, i program...

i absord, i unleash,

we play & enjoy the music.

Silence

is the relative or total lack of audible sound.

2005 hakim bey interview

Hakim Bey: …automobiles used to look quite beautiful, some of them. Now, even the cars of the very rich – you can hardly tell them from the cars of the bourgeoisie. They’re all the same boring, puffy-looking cars: No flare, no aerodynamics, no daring art deco. What is a modern “Bugatti”? It’s nothing. Even the Arab sheiks don’t dare to have beautiful cars like before. Why? Nobody knows how to make them? What’s the big deal?

Of course, it’s all just cars. It’s all just disgusting shit, but within that bad technology, which started so nice…

Alexandre Miltsov: It’s just getting worse and worse.

HB: Yeah.

AM: Nowadays, they do “retromobiles”. They take a “Chrysler” like it used to be 50-60 years ago and rebuild it with all the modern gadgets. It looks even more repulsive.

HB: It’s just post-modernism. It’s not good or new design.

AM: What still amazes me in America, even though I’ve lived in Canada for five years, is this tremendous amount of cars everywhere. Public transportation is basically dead. And, as we know, it has been maliciously removed.

HB: It is true. It’s absolutely true. I don’t own a car – it’s not because I am so virtuous but rather because of circumstances. But I’m glad I don’t own a car – many times when I think about that – it’s horrible. At least I’m not adding to that particular misery. But if I didn’t go into other people’s cars – I would never get anywhere, except on a few rare bus stops.

AM: Since we’re talking about cars, what do you think about the projected “World Oil Peak”? It’s not a big secret that there is no real substitute for oil to run the existing gigantic world-industry. There’s a countless list of things running on and demanding oil; cars, of course, are on the top. So what do you think about oil depletion and all that?

HB: What a lot of people would say, primarily the “techno-optimists”, is that when the oil runs out – the other technologies will become economically feasible. So, they will have to run all the cars on hydrogen, or salad oil, or sunshine. But we will still have cars. It’s a horrible thought but they may be right. They may solve the problem.

AM: But most probably it’s not going to happen that way. There are no real alternatives. There’s not enough sunshine to power all these cars,there’s not enough salad oil – I mean you need to grow crops to get it - a lot of it! And almost all the good land is already in use. It has been paved over by these gigantic roads – you have Eisenhower Interstate Highway system here. And the so-called “hydrogen economy” is a myth, of course.

HB: That’s right. I’m just saying that we ought to think about all this from the “techno-fix” point of view. So far, they’ve always come up with something. History leads us to believe that they’ll figure something out. At least, we have to take it into consideration. After all, they have all the money in the world to spend on the most brilliant scientists and technologists.

But it seems that they’re not preparing. And that’s the interesting part. They’re acting as if there’s no tomorrow: they don’t think like American Indians or the Chinese for seven generations – they think for seven minutes. If you’re lucky – 15 minutes! That makes you think that there won’t be any smooth transition, brokered by the usual technological and capitalistic bla-bla. And maybe some crisis will occur, some fracture in this happy story. Should we hope for that or should we be incredibly afraid because of that? It’s hard to say. Anything short of the complete breakdown of civilization – nothing is working anymore – it’s going to be war, plague, horrible. Or can you still believe in a situation where the proponents of “the alternatives” have seized power in time to prevent it from happening? Can we really talk about “seizing power” in a context like that?

AM: Well, yes and no. “Power” is so obscure these days. I mean, “seizing” what? A TV or a radio-station?

HB: Yes, and you can have 2 billion dollars and think that you can change the world, and there’s nothing, no effect at all. Nothing seems to work.

AM: There is a popular and rather naïve belief that when the whole system, the Spectacle, will start to run out of energy – oil, gas and other resources – it will gradually loosen its grip on people’s minds and throats. The Media may still be there, the Capital will be there but they will be weak and disintegrated, and so society will inevitably break down into small autonomous collectives, not controlledby the outside world.

HB: Well, the attitudes are changing but the problem is – and now I can speak about the situation here locally - since I have been living here for 6-7 years, I have some insights – and that is that these attitudes are informed by reformism. They are not informed by a critique of capitalism or even of technology. The Green Party is a good example; basically, it’s a hobby group for losers. Here, by strange circumstances, we have a Green Party village government. I am still glad for that, I guess, but so far they haven’t accomplished anything here, except for some symbolic stuff. And the reason for this, I think, is that people of this reformist tendency are not really interested in building real alternative institutions.

For example, this movement is not taking place through labor unions, or food-cooperatives, or producers-cooperatives; it’s not taking place through free schools or alternative schools. It’s not taking place through autonomous action!

Look at the organic food situation: the big companies have already discovered that the organic food is a market and they’re in it, they’re marketing it. And for most of the consumers of organic food this is not a political issue. It’s a health issue. So they don’t care; if Monsanto is going to sell them health food – they’ll buy it from Monsanto. In other words, these nice impulses, these changing attitudes - some of which are forced on people by economic difficulties, as you pointed out, and some of which are voluntary, assumed out of a lifestyle or even out of consumerist attitude towards the “authentic” and the “organic” and the “alternative”, which after all is a market - it all runs into the sand, all the energy runs into the sand.

People with wonderful attitudes and desires that are good desires; but since there is no comprehensive movement, there’s nothing other than these “positive attitudes” and there’s no way to focus them.

I went to a Peace March yesterday – it was the anniversary of the beginning of the war in Iraq. I swear it was like being back in the 60s again: same clothes, same slogans:

“- What do we want?- Peace! - When do we want it?- Now!”

We’ve been saying this for 40 years and we still haven’t realized that symbolic action and symbolic discourse is NOT Action!

And this is even better: there was a counter-demonstration, and the anti-demonstrators were yelling at us that we were communists! This is like a civil war reenactment; it’s like people in medieval costumes pretending to be knights and ladies. Totally bizarre. I haven’t been going to demonstrations lately, so I thought maybe a few things have changed. But no! It’s just “a blast from the past” - for everybody, including the fascists who thought that they were still living in 1979. Very strange.

And this is it! You go, you have a march, you say: “Not in my name!” And then you go home and watch TV. You don’t then go out and start an alternative institution: a church, a farm, a commune…

AM: A pleasure club.

HB: Or even a pleasure club! Instead, they just go home and watch TV.

AM: And then they go to work and get their salaries from the same people who are waging the war. And the taxes go to war, of course.

HB: Exactly! And of course, you NEED your SUV; you NEED your cellular phone. These are real needs. So all these so-called “green people” around here are sucking up gasoline and cement… Just “not in my backyard” – that’s what they say. They are not going to swear off using cement. They will say: “Move the cement plant to Mexico”. I can’t participate in this pseudo-politics; there is no entry-point for me here.

AM: Back to the “Peace March”: the Iraq war looks like it is going to last long. We don’t really know what’s happening there; there are all sorts of media, mainstream and alternative, producing all sorts of “news” and speculations. But who in his or her sane mind will trust them? They are the media after all. The notion I have is that it’s going to be a big, long and ugly war for the last remnants of oil and for the control of the Gulf region. What do you think?

HB: I think you’re right or you might as well be right. We might as well plan on what you’ve just said; because it would be foolish to think that they’re going to stop just because we don’t like it. They’ve already proved that it’s not going to happen.

Let me try to be an “anti-pessimist” here and point out that if you are right, and I think you are, this will also involve a continuation of this unbelievable deficit spending and going into debt that we are practicing here in the US, both on the personal and the national level. And it must eventually lead to an economic collapse, as far as I can see. For one thing, Europe is going to be driven a little bit further to the left by anti-Americanism, so you will get more things like the mayor of Paris or the Spanish government happening -kind of nostalgic social-democratic, but still no longer interested in playing the global game with America as the sole superpower.

In fact, the whole ten years of globalism and neo-liberalism are already over. We are at a new stage now. That is why the anti-globalist movement suddenly seems so dead and irrelevant.

Going further with the scenario: A couple of other major things can happen, like China shifting its economic activities from the dollar to the euro and OPEC is, of course, practically out, and so forth.

So America is isolated economically: we don’t produce anything here anymore – we can’t be self-sufficient in terms of industry. We don’t make shoes here; we don’t make umbrellas, pencils. We make entertainment and information. We don’t even make the fucking computers! We produce the ideas that occupy the computers. That’s why artists are so important right now – it’s one of the few things that we actually produce. So the arts are hot, some artists are successful – this whole area around here is full of artists, and they drove the real estate prices up. So, now you can’t move into this county for less then 250,000 dollars. Thanks to the artists! You wonder why people get angry at artists – it’s not our fault – we’re just looking for low rent but the real-estate developers are following us, sniffing our butts wherever we go to find out where the next beautiful cheap real-estate is going to be…

So on with the scenario: in 1984 if somebody had asked “would the Soviet Union break up”, everybody would go “ha-ha-ha” – nonsense; it will never happen! In 1984, if people asked whether the United Kingdom would break up, if Scotland would be independent again – “Oho-ho-ho! – This would be a joke!” Just 20 years ago, it would be a total joke. Well, it happened - and to Yugoslavia too. So, it could happen here. Things move so quickly. It’s possible that with the neo-liberal period already over, we’re now into something new –the American Empire, and maybe that will only last for 8 years -10 years.

That’s why recently I have taken an interest in the idea of separatism and secession. Because, I think that the only optimistic or anti-pessimistic way of reading the American future is to see the breakup of the American Empire, meaning a political breakup, just like in the USSR. And, as you know very well, this is a mixed blessing - to put it mildly. But there is one advantage to it, and that is that you get a small social unit that you can deal with – maybe, if you’re lucky.

It can very well happen in America, and people have already started to talk about it. I’m writing articles trying to push that idea. If I’m wrong – I’ll be wrong. To me it’s just a tactic, because from an anarchist point of view, secession is good because you get a smaller unit to deal with and eventually – this is straight Proudhon – you will break it down into autonomous regions, and then you confederate them in an anarcho-federalist union, completely voluntarily and based on popular democracy with revocable delegates. And as he put, it is necessary to organize for production and if necessary defense. This is an anarchist ideal, and secession could be a step towards it. As we know, it can also end up in a fascist nightmare. This is a dangerous idea, I admit, but I don’t see any other interesting political possibility for America.

AM: We’re dealing here with colossal amounts of nuclear and regular weapons. So, secession can turn out really messy and bloody. What do you think?

HB: Yes, yes. But if you look at England – Scotland has regained its independence surprisingly peacefully. If you look at USSR – there was very little bloodshed during the breakup. This was a remarkable event in human history; which is, that millions of people didn’t die in these strange political series of events. Could we possibly be hopeful? Could we be anti-pessimistic enough to think that the same thing could happen here, despite our well-known love of weapons? If you have to keep revolutionary hope alive, as Bloch, the German Marxist philosopher, said, then this is the best thing I can see at the moment. There’s no leftist movement in America, there’s no populist movement here, and the best thing that could happen is that this fucking thing just breaks up. So right now I am in favor of the politics of the very worst.

I wasn’t going to vote against Bush. For one thing, I’ve never voted in my life and I didn’t want to ruin my lifetime record for something as stupid as that. I didn’t vote FOR Bush either, but I knew he was going to win whether it was legal or not. It was clear that he would win. Actually, we are very close to some kind of weird post-modern fascism here, including the Reichstag Fire and the whole fucking thing.

read more

dreams that money can buy

bitches brew

thursday

still don't buy it.

have forgiven it all.

it all goes beyond.

clean slate for new cycles.

Fever